My World is Oz. =')


Today's chatting, after discussion:
I'm fat and I'm ugly.I'm not smart and full of stupidity. what part of this piece buggy bag called Vinka which made you still miss me?

all of yours. your fat etc. aku cinta keseluruhannya tanpa kata kecuali. sebab, daya apa yang membuatku berani menantang Tuhan tatkala ia limpahkan suatu rizki. tidak untuk diingkari, lebih2 harus dipeluk-syukuri.

Cheri, you are Oz.


Goodbye is (Never) Easy


Let's say, it's habitual. I used to do it regularly, daily and it becomes a part of my life. Now, let's change the word "it" with "love you". Then the sentence will be a very romantic one. How about change the word into "hate you". Then it becomes a cruel one.

Saying goodbye is easy, but how you do the implementation is another thing. Yesterday I declared on giving up and letting go into someone which haunted me for these last 3 years. The ghost. Even the ghost haunted me in a negative way, but I admit that I'm addicted too. I used to scare it, hate it, and when I start to let go, there is a place which vaguely, start feeling lonely

Quoting my workmate, mbak Fidya, I won't try to forget it hardly, but I'll try to be usual for not remembering it. 

Take care there, ghost. I believe you'll miss me too. 
Yesterday I buried you deeply.  
This morning, I sprinkle flowers on the grave with a smile.
Bon continuation, phantome.




This picture is ambiguous. It doesn't clear, which one was the focus and the meaning. I know it could be about the technical problem, the camera quality, etc. But I thought the main problem is me, a man behind the gun (or the camera in this case). 

I actually want to take an awkward situation, when I had a breakfast at Food Hall, Setiabudi One. I came so early then the cleaner still wiped the window when my dish arrived. That's it. But I failed to tell it in a picture. I neglected the angle and several things including the focus of the picture. 

I feel the same when I look at my life. I lost my focus for last several times. I forgot how to live this life in my way. I should start to back on the beat, to back on the heat of adventurous life. It's different situation, I know. But now, I've enlightened. I do know where I should put my first step. I'll make a list, as usual, and do it step by step. Peu a peu. I'm sure I could do this better this time, because I have a gentle hand from a gentle man to hold me stand still in anytime.

First thing first, let's start in focusing my sister's wedding on this weekend.


Break a Leg


Whoah, I felt that it's been ages I haven't written here (exaggeration, fellas. It's actually 9 days, though. =P). For doing so "after the journey" took a lot of my time. You know, to make a report to office, include the fund, yada yada, et cetera, et cetera. 

May were being a month of wed. After Mpok Devi Handa, 
from left: Mita, Uwi, me, mpok Devi, Nia, Manda
then my companion & neighbour from elementary school, junior till college: Ustika Rizky, and next week: MY SISTER! Aw aw aw....
And today, I still trying to finish my jarik skirt by myself. I hate for spending money on the things that I could do it by myself.  I'll sew it by hand. I hope it will be great *crossedmyfinger*

Now, let's start it! Break a leg Von...
accompanied by last Kanye West' single:

PS: Yes, this post was created to raise my own spirit. hehehe.


Laundry Time!


After doing a long journey, there's always a home. A place where you realize, this is a real world with a real problem to be faced. But don't worry, you've already got a credit and saving for your life, from your journey off course. You have new energy. You are full-charged, mindfully. 

So, first thing first baby. 
Let's tidying up our life, start from the "robes" we brought in the journey.
It's laundry time!

PS: the picture below is the sneak-peek for my journey stories. Watch out!

yes, it's Monas and 2 girls in abaya. =P


My Favorite Boy


"My prize possession, one and only

Adore you, boy I want you
The one I can't live without
That's you, that's you."
-Favorite Girl, Justin Bieber


Pounding Head.


"A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory."
-- Arthur Golden

Yea, I know it. I know it very well. But it's hard to do. Very, very hard.


Happy Maulid, Bopo. =*


Last Saturday, I went home in a rush. I really want to be there, in Mojosari. I want to give a presence in my bopo special day, his birthday. =) He is 60 years old now. 
Yes, he's old. A kind of awareness that he planted as I had to be ready, when he should left this world. I always hate when he used the term, "you are my last child, which I just have the shortest time to accompany you. You should be ready for any chance. Just believe in one thing, I love you." 

Time after time, I know better, that you love me that much. You don't want me to lose. You don't want me to be  hurt. At this point, I will try harder to show you that I'm going to be a good woman. I'm on my way for being a mature and responsible human. Maybe I will fall Bop, but don't worry, you've already show me how to stand still and face the world bravely. Maybe I will cry, it's okay, as you said, because the tears fallen nourished my power to think clearly and finished my problem as it should be. 

Thank you for being my strong guardian, my discuss partner, my tough debater, my warmest hugger, my wisdom source, my pride. 
Thank you for being the greatest father in the world. Thanks for being you.
I love you, as always, and always will be Bop.
=* =* =*
Most favorite photo with Bopo. In early morning. =*

Stop Commenting. Have A Life, Please?


Manusia mungkin tidak punya kapasitas untuk mengampuni
(mungkin hanya Tuhan yg bisa mengampuni), 
maka yang bisa kita lakukan adalah berdamai.
Berdamai dengan sisi gelap yang tak bisa kita kuasai.
Demikian pula.
Mereka mungkin tak punya kemampuan untuk menghapus cinta dan birahi.
Mereka hanya bisa mencoba berdamai dengan perasaan itu dalam diri masing-masing.
Semoga kelak birahi sublim dalam narasi.
Seperti semula.
(Manjali & Cakrabirawa, Ayu Utami)

*I'm waiting the next book of Ayu Utami. Her Bilangan Fu, Manjali & Cakrabirawa stole my thought. I re-read the book last night. And can't help for not quoting. When will the next book published? =(


*gombal* =P


I'm falling in love. Don't save me.
-Vinka Maharani


Book's Day Out (23-24 April 2011) in c2o Library


It's quite late for telling stories about Book's Day Out, but after read the reportage here (with my photo & Kanti as the first photo. bwahahaha), I want to tell it based on my view. =D

The Book's Day Out (BDO) in c2o Library were actually a peak event of c2o's agenda in April. At the day, every postcard from the "Postcards from Bookworms" were exhibited. 
Postcards from Bookworms publication
But not only postcards, BDO brought us into Book Swap, t-shirt sablonage, and delicious cookies!
My favorite one, peanut butter cookies!
I came with my books to be swapped, but actually I didn't really wanna swap it, just give it to c2o library. Why? Because it was my college books. =P Kat, the c2o owner, said that they also need a basic social studies book. So I think my books will fit in the criteria. =)

I & Kanti, went there and forced to make a postcard. I didn't have any idea at first, but after look Kanti grab some asturo bright color origami paper, I suddenly remember about my favorite book: L.S.D.L.F. by Syahmedi Dean. L.S.D.L.F. is Lontong Sayur dalam Lembaran Fashion, the first of tetralogy Dean's novel. It is the first book which made my eyes wide opened into fashion things. It is lovely, for sure. The cover of L.S.D.L.F. dominate by black, and accentuated by green, mustard and white. That's why I made my postcard like this:
Me & My Postcard. =)
In the process of making postcard
Me & Kanti seeing the postcards
At the afternoon, there was a presentation of postcard maker. I didn't attend, because I've already had another meeting. =( But overall, the event was great. I think it's a new way to support and enhance passion in reading a book. All those beautiful photo above were taken by Erlin Goentoro. (Thank you, Erlin!)You could see another picture taken by her in her flickr account. Anyway, don't forget to visit for knowing much more about the event and everything about c2o library. Keep reading books, fellas! 


The Garage Sale


Saturday morning, I was very exciting to start the day. It'll be my first garage sale. Then I came to the venue at 8am and my mood was dropped looking the venue still unprepared and no committee there. 
No one. =(
Okay, I came back to my boarding house and discussed with my friends about our theme. FYI, for the best decoration in this event will be awarded. So we've agreed to make our stand to be in "Eco-friendly Laundry" theme. 
Kanti and our jemuran
Hanger from scout's stick
It's garage sale, so we sell second-hand book too
The event goes so-so, doesn't crowd too much. If it looks crowd, it is caused by the ratio of visitor and venue space were too tight. It is actually inspacious. And I, honestly, disappointing by committee's rule. They explained to me that, it is garage sale, so your main things to sell was second hand or already owned by another people. You could bring a new thing, but it's a side sales. In fact, another stand were a boutique, or online shop which had 2 rows of hanger in their stand, full stocked by BRAND NEW clothes. And how about their "secondhand things"? It's just one box, or 1 suitcase maximum. 

The worst thing for me, the media publication of this event were too exaggerated. At this article, the committee said the 18th stand sell recycle things made from unused goods. Err... even I didn't sell recycle things, I sell unused clothes and another matter. 

But anyway, there's always a lesson for every fall. Another time, I should take an offer carefully, and do a thorough, precise check & re-check for my business thingies. Big thanks for my friends, which already support me, Kanti, Rida, Tiwi (gembul, gembuk, syium). I believe we could do better than this. Rikza Cmanka, for supplying us the snacks. Nadzor, Poet, She, Khoti for the stuffs. And off course my lovely boyfie, for the energy & your caring presence. Love you all!
Kanti, Tiwi, me. Captured by Rida