Vous avez poser des questions?


"Do you want to ask some question?"

That's a line of my French teacher, after she did explain the lesson. Regularly. 
Question is simple thing, common and will always exist in our daily life. I believe every question had its own answer. Even the silence, were an answer too. Or the tears, when the answer's unbearable to be shouted. And at this point, I feel terrible, because I can't find the answer of my mom's simple question. It's a seriously simple question: 
"What will you do with your Master certificate, if you graduated, in Surabaya?" 
At the time, I froze in some seconds, and answer it as what comes from my mouth, not my brain, nor my heart. And I know, that's not the true answer. 

I know, I could answer "being a consultant, worked with the company or client, etc, etc" but inside my heart I want to be an entrepreneur, starting my own business, grow it day by day. I want to have my own company. But then the next question popped up: 
"To start business, you don't have to learn Master right? Why don't you start it now? Why bother finding scholarship? You've already have the gut, the plan, why don't you do it?"

A reason that answers: Because my Bopo WANT me to. He compared my education with my sisters. He reminded me about my goal at the beginning, why I took acceleration class, why I sprint on my college: to get highest education that I could reach in a shortest time. It becomes hurting me much more when he asked: 
"Are you giving up? Don't you wanna try a little harder, for yourself, for your goal, for ME?"

Since 7 years ago, when I decided to study in Surabaya, I've already had a hard discussion with my parents. Since then, I don't wanna argue too much again, I don't wanna hurt their feelings. I'm their youngest child, I'm the child with the shortest time to run with them. I just want to make they happy. For God sake, they are getting older by the time, and it is a sin for me if I being an egoist and just think about myself, at all. But sacrificing (again), it also hurt me. 

Is it a mistake if we found a new goal in our life? 
Is it wrong to turn your path in a middle of journey?

All of the questions haunted me till now. My long silent night before I slept run out to think the answer, the decision. I became an insomniac. My body exhausted. 

I hate complainer, but this post really grumbling. I'm sorry. I can't handle it.
I am perfectionist. I want everything's perfect, at least in my standard. I want everyone's happy, even I know it's impossible. I think it's a curse for me, asking a perfect in this imperfect world. 

Dieu, pardonnez-moivotre péché paysanne
I have to finished the questions.
I have to do it all alone.
I want everyone's happy: my parents, my husband-to-be, my family.
And the last, I want to be happy too.
Guide me into the lights
Show the right straight path
I'm the helpless, I surrender on Thou
I'm the careless, all power on Thou
Lend me the bravery, to choose
Give me the armory, to loose
On Thou I lean, I ask the keen




Here they are several songs which resounds in my head lately. I start with the mellow-er one. =P

My friend, Rikza Arif, play this song several times in office. And voila, I infected. I'm not in the "galau" moment at this time, so it's just resound in lowest degree. =D 
Anyway, we all know that Lady Antebellum bombs the last Grammy award by won 5 from their 6 nomination. Me, honestly, just know Lady Antebellum by their name before, and never listening to them. But after listened to them, hmm, they ARE good. Very good. 

Sugarland! Fortunately, this is a country group/duo too. And the song's just PERFECT. It had every quality of "resounds" song. =P Check the melody, it is inviting you to sing it along. 
Wo'oah wo'oah, stuck like glue. 
Baby you and me stuck like glue!

Back to Asia, especially Korean. Yes, you're right, I listened K-Pop too. But NO, I'm not following the nowadays trend which Indonesian teenagers start screaming into SuJu, 2PM, 2AM, et cetera, et cetera. I've already fell in love to Shinee like mmm... 2 years ago? I've already wrote them in a post here, you could click and read it. It's purely because of their well-concepted wardrobe, management, songs, age. And I'm in love now, progress of continuously fall in love for exactly, and it makes me sing and watch Shinee's Hello, time after time. Look at their face, fallin love face, like mine! 

And the toplist of "resounds" songs are Yuna's! Yeay!
I don't know how to explain further, but I think Yuna is Malaysian miracle. Her strong lyric, her simple melody successfully stole my attention. Even for 6 months later, from the first I heard her song, "Decorate". Once again, I'm in love, so the "resounds" songs from Yuna were the lovey dovey fall in love songs. =D
The first is Rocket, the second is Super Something. Both of them say love in a very efficient and direct way. So me. Ehehe. These are my favorite lines from both songs:
"I can't believe we almost got famous for nothing baby 
You came the last minute of panic to save me"
"People come and people go And people gonna come some more 
They pick a fight But it's alright 
At least I get to see you tonight, Tonight "
"You'll see, I'm better, I'm faster, Stronger, I'm happier
when you by my side"

What resounds in my head were not only songs, but several thoughts, lines, words. Lately, there are many provoking texts, sentences in medias, including Net, which could makes me angry or feeling emotional. In my past, I might do frontal response as provoking as her/their words. But now, I have love, I have a good life, a very good one. Then, why bothered? 
I'm a Super Something, yes we are, like Yuna said. 
Listen to malicious-mouth just tiring, and useless
Quoting my dear boss, IGAK Satrya Wibawa: 
"Do good, be good and be proud fellas" 

Vinka Maharani


I Hate Luv Storys!


Spoiler Alerts! 

Saya menulis post ini sambil melihat "Dil To Pagal Hai" di channel MNCtv. Ah, film India. Film India selalu menarik buat saya. Menarik juga rasanya mengetahui fakta: salah satu search keyword yg sering nyantol di blog saya adalah film india, khususnya film India lama. =D

Alih-alih membahas film India lama, saya ingin membahas film India yang relatif baru untuk ukuran Indonesia. Yah, mohon dimaklumi, distributor film India di Indonesia tidak banyak, jadi yaa menunggu film India tersebut box office dimana-mana, baru disebarkan di Indonesia. Film ini berjudul "I Hate Luv Storys!" (2010). Film yang berhasil membuat saya jatuh cinta dengan Sonam Kapoor & Imran Khan. Film ini juga yang membuat saya yakin bahwa India masih akan mempunyai penerus sutradara ahli drama romantis Karan Johar, yaitu pendatang baru Punit Malhotra. 

Film ini tidak menawarkan hal yang baru dari plot standar cerita romantis. Simran (Sonam Kapoor) yang sangat memuja drama Bollywood, membuat ia mendalami sepenuh hati pekerjaannya sebagai Art Director di produksi film sutradara kondang Veer Kapoor (Samir Soni). Sebaliknya, Jay Dhingra (Imran Khan) si astrada, asisten sutradara yang turun tahta jadi bawahan Simran karena kelakuan yang minus itu, adalah pembenci hal-hal yang berbau drama & cinta-cintaan. Bisa menebak kelanjutannya? Yap, pasti tidak jauh dari perkiraan Anda kok. Bahkan klimaks dan permasalahannya bisa diprediksi dengan tepat. 

Lalu apa yang menarik dari film ini jika plot dan ceritanya bisa dikira-kira? I Hate Luv Storys memenuhi segala persyaratan film yang menarik: pasangan yang cantik & tampan, akting yang OKE BANGET, detil yang mencuri perhatian, komposisi sinematografi yang nyaman dipandang mata, dan khas film India, lagu-lagu yang gampang dinyanyikan, lirik puitis nan menawan serta gerakan tari yang mudah ditirukan & memorable.

Gerakan yang mudah dihafal di lagu I Hate Luv Storys:

Lagu sedih: Bin Tere..

Saya suka betul dengan film, baik sebagai produk atau pun proses produksinya. I Hate Luv Storys adalah film kedua produksi India setelah "Om Shanti Om" yang menceritakan bahwa pemeran utamanya adalah pekerja di industri Bollywood. Adegan "di balik kamera" yang lucu & menyenangkan ditunjukkan dalam lagu Jab Mila Tu dan Bahara Bahara:

Tapi sekali lagi, yang saya kagumi adalah chemistry yang terbangun antara Sonam dan Imran. Mereka punya "sesuatu" yang mirip dengan apa yang dimiliki Shahrukh-Kajol di Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, 11 tahun silam. Campur tangan Karan Johar sebagai produser tentu tidak bisa dilepaskan dari keseluruhan film ini. Tapi dari film ini, saya belajar banyak: betapa tidak seharusnya minder itu muncul atas ide yang umum. Sesuatu yang umum ini ketika dikemas dengan sentuhan personal, penuh ketelitian dan komposisi yang cermat, dapat menghasilkan hasil yang maksimal. Paling tidak, untuk film I Hate Luv Storys, ia maksimal secara ekonomis*.

PS: I Hate Luv Storys berbujet $ 3.77 juta dan berpenghasilan kotor $ 13.04 juta. =D


21st Century Girl: Me


Give me an inch
I promise I'll take a mile
Danger is beauty
I'll face it with a smile
Don't second guess myself
I'm born to be wild

I'm the type of chick
That likes to rock the beat
I like to rock the beat
I like to rock, to rock the beat

21st Century Girl
I do what I like
21st Century Girl
I’m taking you for a ride
21st Century Girl
A beautiful life
Us walking side by side
21st Century Girl
Yeah, I'm gonna live it up
Just live it up

I am a rebel
But I do it with class
I set the boundaries
The rules don't own me
I'm living life on the edge,
I choose my path

(21st Century Girl -- Willow Smith)


Ngilo (pada Gus Sholah)


Hidup sekali jangan dijual.. 

Hati cuma satu jangan digadai..

Kepala cuma satu, jangan untuk berpikir yang tak perlu...

Tangan cuma dua, jangan untuk mengambil yang bukan milik kita..

Kaki cuma dua, jangan untuk berdiri saja..

Mata cuma dua, jangan untuk melihat masa lalu saja...

Membaca rentetan twit Fajar Nugros sore ini rasanya membekas. Dalam. Menumbuhkan rasa ingin 'bercermin' atas diri sendiri. Dan membuat sosok-sosok yang pernah saya temui dan menginspirasi, melintas kembali di kepala. Seperti foto di atas, yang saya ambil di kediaman Gus Sholah. Saya kebetulan turut mendampingi rombongan dari ADFA student, University of New South Wales berkunjung ke Tebu Ireng, Jombang. Alhamdulillah, dapat bertemu dan bertukar fikir tentang kerjasama pesantren dengan Universitas Airlangga dan UNSW. Beliau mencuri perhatian dengan kesahajaan, kecerdasan, kesigapan dan keramahannya yang tidak dibuat-buat.
Bagaimana cara meneladaninya?
Bagaimana begini? Bagaimana begitu? 

O Dieu, introspeksi dari hati ini semoga tak hanya sementara.

Ngilo : [verba] bercermin (bahasa jawa)


Jatuh (Cinta) Terus


"Tapi saya percaya,  jatuh cinta untuk kesekian kalinya ke orang yang sama meski status berbeda, adalah cara terindah untuk mencintai seseorang." 

-Agustino Sasongko


Yes! Kaos Gathotkaca Studio Ada di Roodebrug!


Bener Jeh. Gathotkaca Studio telah bekerjasama dengan Roodebrug Soerabaia yang berlokasi di Jalan Pucang Anom Timur no 70 Surabaya. Kaos-kaos kami bisa kamu temukan dan beli langsung di sini. Tentu merchandise lainnya seperti gantungan kunci dan Rubik a.k.a Surobic Dulinan Mbois juga ada. Tempatnya gampang dicari, nyaman dan mantab jaya. Sabtu besok, 19 Maret 2011, ba'da maghrib adalah launching resmi dari Roodebrug Soerabaia. Monggo langsung datang, karena ada remo, cak & ning, serta segala yang khas Surabaya. Kalau mau beli merchandise Gathotkaca juga bisa. Hehe. Ayo Jeh, mampir mrene kabeh! Oke Jeh? 

Cacak Ikin dengan corner kami
Nyiapin jualan sama cacak. photo by Ady Setyawan


Beautiful Ending


"Aku ingin kamu, yang kucinta, juga dicintai oleh orang-orang lain."

-- Mon Cheri





Yesterday, when we had a long talk discussion, you ask me why do I have a sparkle in the corner of my eyes. I feel like I'll cry. It doesn't mean I'm sad. It's just the mixed feeling. I felt affected with your words, with our condition, with our progress. I feel it's just yesterday, when I finally realize your presence in the same class in campus at 5th semester and ask to myself: 
wait a minute, do I have a classmate named Rendy? =D 
Sorry for my bloody ignorant. I always have my own world, where I put up everything steadily and make my world perfect. I thought it was perfect. But now I know what perfect is after you completed me.

Putting you in my world, with it's plan, with it's consequence, brings much feeling in me. Happy, eagerness, curious, a little bit afraid, coy, and several indescribably feelings. Put aside my feeling anyway, because I trust you

Thanks for called me as "a dateline to be struggled".
Thanks for awaken me from my long sleep as an ignorant.
Thanks for being there. 

Reciting your own words Cheri, which fits me this morning:
"Aku ingin mendongak pada pagi, 
menyeru jika aku takluk pada seseorang di sana.
Lantaran aku cinta."

Cheri, I love you.

Ta Cherie


Beyond Spotlight


It's fun to be underrated
We're off the radar while we're actually shining
- Diana Rikasari


Extra Random Things in My Head


It was a long weekend and I love this Monday (7th March) become its perfect closing. I could make my boyfie surprised and we spent a high quality time. And as the clock ticking, my brain works randomly tonight. And I don't want to ruin my beautiful night with this scattered thoughts. So I'll tell you several, as this blog were my daily Pensieve. Hehe.

1. Me? Clairvoyant?
I always try to be different, directly or indirectly. There is no specific reason why. I think it's just my character. My both elder sister went to study in health, based on my parent wishes. And me? Being a social science freak, range from communication until economy.  I'm not really into a "la mode tendance" (the newest mode), I'm based on my mood. Don't get me wrong, I know and I'd like to know and find out what's hot in the world now but it doesn't mean it will be hot on my own list.

In this blog, you'll see 2 main colors which inspired me for a year ago. I called it as mustard yellow and turqoise. I saw this both colors had their special character. And I thought, it MUST be a hit color combination for next one or two years when people had recognized. And last week, Scott Schuman captured it perfectly in his beyond famous blog,

 You could see it here for a complete blog-post with the discussion attached on comment area. People start trying to call: what kind of color is it? What is the right name for this kind of blue? They called it as teal, petroleum blue, or peacock, or another name. I, personally, still using turqoise as a name to call it. Thanks God some expert finally blow these colors up! Because now, I start having another "clue" color. I'll tell ya later! =P

2. Traffic Jam is the Pain in Ass!
I have a bad experience in "traffic jam thingies" last weekend. I had to experience Surabaya to Malang as 6 hours trip! Three times longer than usual. Oh please. I believe, it isn't only about holiday, but also a combination of management mistakes. Okay, mentioned the fact there are 2 accidents, 3 broken trucks at the tracks. But how ignorant if in the traffic jam situation, suddenly police siren sounds loudly, asking people to give a way for government officials. Twice! Oh shoot!

3. Fund & Film
I was a Sinematografi UA member, when I still did my study at Universitas Airlangga. Now, I am still, but less active off course.  But this March, Production division invites every member to participate in "BBF - Bulan Bikin Film" and I decide to involve further. I choose to be a Producer/Production Manager which had a tough agenda on pre-production and production stage. In a commercial film, Producer have a responsibility for the sustainability of film production, include funding. But in independent movie, I think it becomes a vast coverage, from scheduling to funding. I work with Wisang Wijaya, a great director from our club, the winner of several movie competition including LA Light Indie Movie 2007. Both of us had a vision to make this BBF movie as a good movie: not only on the result, but also in the process. I wish the best luck on us, me and our crews. Can't wait this Thursday, my next crews meeting. =D

4. Random Photo!
Random thought was incomplete with random photo(s). Hehehehe. These are several photos from my cell-camera last 2 weeks. Enjoy!
Cergamboree promo session in 87.7 FM Colors Radio
 Joking with Surabaya legend animator: PakWaw!
Mbak Khrisna & Simon Hureau, the guess comic artist
Comic on Ceramics! #1
Comic on Ceramics! #2
Comic on Ceramics! #3
Cacak in Action.
Romusha in SuroBoyo shirt! =P
Bored in office. =P